Choosing a spouse is one of the most important decisions we’ll ever make. But before you even think about getting married, you need to know if you and your partner are truly compatible and ready to stay married. Here are some questions to help you figure that out, according to licensed marriage therapist, Dr. Dan Neuharth:
Question #1: Is this person really “The One?” Psychologists say all relationships serve a purpose in our lives, but that doesn’t mean they’re all built to last. In fact, some relationships are only meant to teach us something, either about ourselves or how we interact with others. So ask yourself and be honest: “Can I really imagine myself with this person when I’m 80?”
Then ask yourself this: “Am I ready to be FAITHFUL for the rest of my life?” Dr. Neuharth says most people describe married life as “boring.” And couples who understand that and are confident they can stay happy with their partner, even when things are dull, are more likely to last. But people who thrive on excitement may not be ready for the monotony of married life.
Another question to ask before getting married: “Do my partner and I share the same goals?” This includes goals for having kids, choosing where to live, or how to handle money. Because in the long run, Dr. Neuharth says our goals matter more than things like chemistry and shared interests.
One more question to ask: “How do we handle our relationships with each other’s FAMILY?” Dr. Neuharth says, while your relationship with your partner should always come first, it’s also important to talk about how parents and in-laws will fit into your lives. Like who will you visit during holidays? And how would you handle it if someone in your family asks to borrow money? Or needs medical care? Bottom line: Before you say “I do,” make sure you and your partner are truly on the same page.